I had this in the works for a while. Since January, but I never finished writing it. I started it, but I couldn't finish it. For some reason though, yesterday I acutally had the heart to write it. I hope yo like it. It actually took more emotion effort then I had hoped.

They passed on a crowded staircase. He was going up, she was going down. Despite the fact that they passed side by side, and the stairway was over crowded, they didn’t brush up against each other. They both avoided each other’s touch. They were both afraid of what might happen if they did.

~*~

Cut the skin to the bone

Fall asleep all alone

Hear your voice in the dark

Lose myself in your eyes

Choke my voice say goodnight

As the world falls apart

Fuck, I can’t let this kill me let go

I need some more time to fix this

~*~

As they passed, she felt herself shaking. She ran a finger across her smooth unscathed wrist, and still couldn’t believe a friend of hers had done it, then again, she could feel her friend’s pain. She tried to shake the thoughts from her head, but couldn’t. ‘Sleep,’ she thought to herself. ‘I just need sleep.’ But she couldn’t sleep. She heard his voice though the darkness, blocking sleep from her mind. All she had to do was think of him and she could see his soft brown eyes. She choked up as she thought of him, stumbled a bit, tears threatening to spill over her eyes. She rushed to her class as she felt her world collapse. She couldn’t even brush past him in the hall now. It all hurt way too much and all she wanted was for it to stop. Sleep couldn’t heal her though. Only time could.

~*~

We’ve been here before a few times

And I’m quite aware we’re dying

And your hands they shake with goodbyes

And I’ll take you back if you’ll have me

So here I am, I’m trying

So here I am, are you ready?

Come on let me h old you touch you feel you

Always

Kiss you taste you all night

Always

~*~

During their relationship, they had gone through periods where they wouldn’t talk to each other for a few days, but everything would still be all right. Now though, since they broke up, they hadn’t talked in almost a month. Everything that had passed between them was now dying, and it was dying faster then he had hoped it would. And he knew she wasn’t over it. When they passed briefly on the stairs, he had noticed she had been shaking horribly. And he knew it was because of him, and it gave him an unsettling feeling. He didn’t want things to be that way. If only she’d give him a sign that she’d take him back, he would go to her easily. He remembered the nights of passion, and he regretted breaking up with her. He couldn’t even remember why he did it. He just wished she were in his arms again.

~*~

Here’s a letter for you

But the words get confused

And the conversation dies

Apologize for the past

Talk some shit, take it backs

Are we cursed to this life?

Fuck I can’t let this kill me, let go

I need some more time to fix this problem

I need some more time to fix this problem

I need some more time to fix this

~*~

The second she handed him the letter she regretted writing it. It didn’t express what she needed to say properly by any stretch of the imagination, and she knew that it would just make things worse, but she still handed him the letter. They talked briefly, just mindless small talk, but it was the most they had said to each other in a month, so they both embraced it almost happily. She wanted to just take the letter back and apologize for whatever it was that she did, but she couldn’t make her mouth form the words. As she watched him walk away, she felt like just breaking down and crying the tears she had wanted to cry for the past month. She felt cursed as she watched him disappear around a corner, as she realized those would be the last words they ever spoke to each other for a long time.

~*~

And I’ll miss your laugh and smile

I’ll admit I’m wrong if you’d tell me

I’m so sick of fights I hate them

Lets start this again for real

So here I am I’m trying

So here I am are you ready

So here I am I’m trying

So here I am are you ready

Come on let me hold you touch you feel you

Always

Kiss you taste you all night

Always

Touch you feel you

Always

Kiss you taste you all night

Always

~*~

He was surprised when she actually approached him in the halls. She handed him the letter, and asked how his day was going. He had made some witty comment, and she had actually laughed. When she did that, he didn’t realize how much he had missed the sound of her laugh and the look in her eyes when she smiled. He wanted to tell her that he had been wrong in breaking up with her, and beg for her forgiveness, but he didn’t know how to word it. He considered a letter, like she had, but he still didn’t know what she had to say, so he quickly banished the thought. All he knew was that he wanted to start over, no matter what he had to do to make it happen. He still wasn’t ready to let her go.

~*~

I’m talking to the ceiling

My life just lost all meaning

Do one thing for me tonight

I’m dying in this silence

The last star left in heaven

Is falling down to earth and

Do you still feel the same way?

Do you still feel the same way?

Fuck I can’t let this kill me let go

I need some more time to fix this problem

I need some more time to fix this problem

I need some more time to fix this

~*~

That night, she couldn’t sleep. In fact, for the next ten months, sleep almost refused to come to her. When she did sleep, she dreamed, and he always haunted her dreams. His voice, his eyes, his touch, it was driving her insane. Fall had come again, and it had been nearly a year. She knew she should be long over him, and in a way, she was, but something still remained. Something that was never settled, and she wanted to find a way to let it rest. She looked up into the night sky from her porch, and watched a shooting star float across the sky. She watched it disappear, and made a wish, a wish to finally settle things with him, no matter how hard it would be. She had kept putting off talking to him, always saying time will step in and fix things, but it wasn’t. She knew that she had to do something. It was now or never.

~*~

I’ve been here before a few times

And I’m quite aware we’re dying

Come on let me hold you touch you feel you

Always

Kiss you taste you all night

Always

Touch you feel you

Always

Kiss you taste you all night

Always

~*~

He didn’t think about her very much anymore. He had a new romantic interest in his life, and was happy, but there were the days when his thoughts would linger back to her. He knew that anything between them was now dead. He should have done something after she gave him the letter, but for some reason he didn’t. Maybe he would have done something to prepare himself for what was to come. Or maybe he expected it.

~*~

To Be Continued…